Category: Philosophy – An Examined Life

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You See? Now Everything Is Different

Don Henley says life can change In A New York Minute. Yes, suddenly things can get a little strange.

More commonly though life evolves. When I look back at happenings a year ago, two years, ten; those things that made me crazy or filled me with joy – they’re gone. Replaced with new challenges and rewards.

Hindsight is an interesting animal. I see progress when I look in the rearview mirror; not just materially, but emotionally and spiritually. Finding myself in a place of peace and self-possession is gratifying. Appreciating this mindset gives me the momentum to keep up the discipline and awareness that got me here.

Human nature wants more; wants expansion. If I don’t grow, I stagnate. Fortunately, I’m predisposed with infinite wants and needs. New longings come up, new missions revealed; someone crosses my path and opens me to new opportunities for self-growth.

And it’s possible to more consciously direct my evolution. When I pay attention to my intuition, my gut; I feel those moments when change is possible. It can start out a bit fuzzy, but if I intentionally focus on the feeling, ambiguity fades. A shift in perspective is palpable.

The mystics are right – I can create the future with my imagination, and they invite me to try. By testing the hypotheses they present; the world becomes my canvas. What I’m learning is fascinating and revealing. Revealing the beliefs that block me; fascinating when unexpected benefits appear.

“Nothing has such power to broaden the mind as the ability to investigate systematically and truly all that comes under thy observation in life.” — Marcus Aurelius

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Relax; Don’t Believe What You See

Moving the needle on deeply entrenched belief systems is like walking in quicksand. It’s the struggle that traps me. I can emerge if I relax, float and slowly rise.

Still, changing course can be difficult considering objective reality reveals what I believe. The stumbling blocks are what I see with my eyes, feel on my skin, smell with my nose. The belief itself perpetuates its existence, giving it added legitimacy.

When I’m unwilling to modify a belief, nothing changes. Life marches on and I drag today into tomorrow – my hopes and desires seemingly futile. But if I’m open to examine the truths I consider unquestionable and absolute, change becomes possible.

Instant self-transformation is not a thing; yet the wish for magical fulfillment isn’t unique. Imagine parting a curtain and stepping through a portal to the heart’s desire. Let’s walk through that mysterious veil to a different world. Tempting; but a mean slippery slope. It’s better to follow a progressive path. A gradual change is less jarring, and more likely I can enjoy the company of my familiars along the way.

It’s possible to interrupt a recurring difficulty by observing my reactions to people and events. They reveal my self-concept, which could be sweet and satisfying or prickly and uncomfortable. It all plays out in front of me in the tangible world. The key is to suspend judgement; positive or negative. Let me be tolerant, charitable even with my observations.

Noticing the feeling is the first Step to relieve the pressure of judgement. Acknowledging its mine; how frequently and intensely it appears puts the emotion in perspective. This insight eventually allows me to set the burden down; to relax.

In a world that demands instant gratification, patience isn’t always appreciated. Taking baby steps to a heartfelt goal is learned behavior. We can definitely get there from here, a degree at a time. The trick is to stop struggling – float and slowly rise.

“You can’t change how people treat you or what they say about you.  All you can do is change how you react to it.”

― Mahatma Gandhi

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Hey! Don’t Let Me Down

Learning what hooks my psyche is a journey up a spiral stairway. Glaring and obvious troubles are identified and addressed in due course. Okay, done. Then it’s back – the worry, the frustration, the resentment; hooked again.

Didn’t I learn that lesson? Well, sort of. This go-around is simply a variation on that theme; a tad more profound and nuanced maybe. It can feel like I’m doomed, but I’m not.

Each step up the staircase refines my spirit; making it lighter and more genuine.

Two coping mechanisms I acquired early on were “I don’t want to disappoint you” and “I’ll show you.” A Yin/Yang duo for the ages.

Success stories in my portfolio show those assholes who said I couldn’t do something; that, YES I can – and I DID. Most of the time they didn’t even know I was trying to prove anything. But I did. That’s what mattered.

That combative device isn’t as necessary anymore. When it does show up, I see it for what it is. This gives me the opportunity to choose. Is this more self-validation? Or is it bigger than me? There is a difference.

Barry H. Gillespie

As for the people pleasing business, that one’s a bit more insidious – or I’m being thickheaded. Recently, I didn’t want to “let down” some anonymous player in a hidden object game I started playing during the pandemic. “LENE” and I kicked ass on the Detective Challenges. Now I want to move on. How can I mourn the loss of someone I never met? Why do I feel like I’m letting her down?

Curiously I have no answers yet, I’m just sitting with the discomfort. The insight I seek may be a few steps away. Or maybe delighting my higher self is my true objective.

“All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”

― J. R. R. Tolkien
“Don’t Let Me Down“
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Invent A Better Future

My music playlist includes a version of Aerosmith’s “Walk This Way” . . . it starts with “Get the f*** off of the fence!” Delightful motivation – or a subconscious nudge to commit? Discovering the deep roots to walk an ordinary road, despite a lifetime of rebellious conduct is eye opening. Habits are planted and ingrained in us through culture, generation and the traditions we’re born to.

My personal nemeses include: “Don’t rock the boat. “Don’t upset the apple cart.” “Be a lady and don’t make a fuss.” “Smile and be nice.”

Shouldn’t some boats be rocked, and rotten apples tossed? There are certainly situations ripe for a ruckus. And who walks around constantly smiling?

Rebellion is a recurring theme of mine. In the corporate world testing showed two of my leadership derailers were being “mischievous” and “melodramatic.” My derailers. I was quite proud of that.

Still, I was indoctrinated to play my part. To be other than what is normal and customary is risky and threatening. It’s uncomfortable to go against convention – and yet hellaciously pedestrian; a tedious walk between birth and death. When I’m bored I rebel, then pull back when things get edgy. This is life by trial and error; thought-provoking, but likely inefficient and cockeyed.

Being radical brings conflict which isn’t necessary. And when I don’t look deep enough any good in that tossed apple is lost. It’s possible to be quietly unorthodox and bring about change. Even discreet unconventional acts can influence my surroundings, where playing the chameleon may perpetuate the status quo.

When I use my imagination, I create different and specific realities. This is a new approach for me. Using concepts from the work of Neville Goddard motivated me to try. It’s fun – not at all difficult. Trusting that it works is the challenge. By starting small, I use each success to move on to bigger, more entrenched beliefs that can use an overhaul.

When I tap into my desires and aspirations a window opens to show me what I’m missing, revealing a sense of lack. Visualizing the desire fulfilled from my mind’s eye – feeling the pleasure, my longing evaporates. By accepting that my world mirrors my self-concept, my mind and my beliefs, when I don’t like what I see, I can change it.

Getting off that fence to live an authentic life without apology is a decision and a discipline. Seeing beyond what is, invents my best life. My playlist is here to remind me.

“There is no fiction. Imagine better than the best you know.”
― Neville Goddard; The Law and the Promise

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Reactions Reveal Belief

Practicing Eckhart Tolle’s advice to “watch the thinker” as described in his book The Power of Now showed me how often my mind was overrun with trivia. It was enlightening to find my thoughts dominated by the refrain of a song or a scene from a sit-com. It took conscious, persistent work to retrain my mental habits. I still enjoy humming a favorite tune or thinking about some show’s witty or memorable dialog; just not incessantly.

This quote caught my attention because my current studies have me reflecting on my reactions as an indication of my beliefs. Watching my own reactions and finding the implied belief takes watching my thoughts to a different level. Of course, I started with my most uncomfortable and disagreeable reactions. Modifying them I thought was the best way to improve my life.

My beliefs supporting contrary, querulous and dismal responses weren’t too surprising. Common-sense and a little analytical thinking showed the limitation and absurdity of the beliefs that don’t serve me. Using a few practical techniques and tactics to re-direct my habits is moving me toward more pleasant perspectives.

This morning I was struck by my tendency to focus on dark impulses before turning to thoughts and beliefs that are joyful.

“.. what you see when you look at something depends not so much on what is there as on the assumption you make when you look.” – Neville Goddard

In The Power of Assumption’s chapter on Attitude, Neville Goddard counsels a woman frustrated by her contentious relationship with a coworker. Goddard asks about her mental conversations with her colleague; suggesting she most likely was having exchanges with him in her head that were critical and acrimonious. She admitted as much; saying she forcefully told him off every day on her way to work.

“.. others only echo that which we whisper to them in secret.”

“.. many people are mentally engrossed in conversation and few appear to be happy about it, but the very intensity of that feeling must lead them quickly to the unpleasant incident they themselves have mentally created and therefore must now encounter.”

Goddard explained that she could change this dynamic by imagining her conversations with him as pleasant and congenial. He encouraged her to hear the man praise her, and her responding with thanks. By doing this, methodically, with good intent, she reported a total turn-around with this relationship.

Giving attention to building my own joyful thought muscles I create that energy in my life. Momentum like this will improve my life more than simply pruning dead-end thoughts. Both are probably needed, but their order could be reversed.

“Our life is what our thoughts make it.”

“Reject your sense of injury and the injury itself disappears.”

― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations