Its mind blowing, crazy how hard it is to let shit go. Knowing that this turbulence is baked into my neurobiology, helps me see on some level, that the struggle is partially organic.
This truth can be an excuse or a dare. Making a decision to reprogram my brain – or not; depends on my perceptions. This viewpoint is entangled with the same synaptic bugaboos plus an environmental luck of the draw. Granting myself grace on this journey helps me be patient with the process.
It’s tricky to know when I’m unconsciously holding onto some something. However, my situation – my body – my dreams send messages. Being open to hear the lesson, to make space for awareness so the unconscious becomes conscious is a gift to my spirit.
. . The subway door closed quickly after I slipped out, but before my companions could make it. They ran backwards to push the open button; I impulsively jabbed my hand into the gap to pop it open again. That didn’t work, and I watched as my hand was dragged away.
. . . and then I woke up. Dreams!
Dreams; are they messages from the unconscious? Do they have meaning? Maybe. I’m not one to naturally remember my dreams. This one was a random rare exception. Sharing it with a friend yielded the “let go or be dragged” mantra.
Missives that resonate deeply call for contemplation and reflection. Sometimes insight can be elusive.
When I don’t know but I want to; I reflect on the Serenity Prayer for direction.
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”
Do I have any control over – whatever? No? Then acknowledgment and tolerance are appropriate. If yes, then what can I do to effect change? Guts and grit are helpful here.
Knowing the difference? – there’s no rushing that. Have to sit with it – for who knows how long. Experience tells me I tend to stir the pot and get into mischief, often without considering the consequences. Sheer orneriness or some darn synapse?
When I take my time and listen to that still quiet voice, the ideas that come are helpful. This knowing generally consists of small; one-degree turns in a healthy, positive direction. Wisdom is following these next right steps – wherever they may lead.
“To experience more synchronicity and ‘coincidences’ we need to listen and be aware of the world around us and also our intuition.
That’s how the universe speaks to itself, it’s an ongoing flow of information that comes from both the outside and from within.
Pay attention to how the universe speaks to you today and participate in the flow by being attentive and by listening to your inner voice.”
― Maria Erving
