Tag: #friendship

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I Know You Friend – Love of My Heart

The value of friendship is immeasurable. Nurturing these magical connections takes time, energy and intention. This labor of love has a return on investment beyond my wildest imaginings. My intimates help me learn and grow – they share my triumphs and tragedies. They are the best of life.

“If it’s true from the start
That the names of those we love
Are written on our hearts
And we’ll search ’til we find
In this jungle of confusion
Something that reminds us
How we love each other
Then I think I’ve found the clue
Because I’m certain I remember you“

Michael Franks wrote these words in his song “How I Remember You.”

The emotion this song evokes is how I experience my dearest and most beloved. I knew you before we met. We made a pact to help each other during the interlude of this lifetime. The bond of community; my sangha – is my greatest fortune.

Of this world or beyond – we keep each other; hold space for passage to meet our purpose.

Wherever you are, near or far – you’re still here.

“A chorus of sparrows in summer
Is how I remember you
The fire of maples in autumn
Is how I remember you
The Silence of snowfall in winter
Is how I remember you”

“Don’t walk in front of me… I may not follow
Don’t walk behind me… I may not lead
Walk beside me… just be my friend”

― Albert Camus
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My Path Is Unique – Comparisons Not Required

It’s not about where I am, but the distance I traveled to get here. What I learn along the way is the gift.

Yet our society asks us to rank ourselves against neighbors, co-workers, family and friends regardless of the grace or handicap we’re bestowed at birth. This habit of behavior creates needless suffering.

If I meet someone at some point in time somewhere in space, after spending decades and significant effort getting there; while they were born in a situation nearby – how similar are we?

Click here for: The Sneetches

It’s likely our prospects, temperaments and worldviews are different. Proximity isn’t always related to affinity. Still, we’re on the same path now – that’s not an accident. The tenant “like attracts like” is an explanation, a warning or a promise depending on how you look at it.

There’s a poem by an unknown author that suggests people show up in our lives for a “Reason, Season or Lifetime.” Law of attraction brought us together; the why is ours to discover. What starts out as a helping hand or guidance and comfort during a tough time can mature into a lifelong friendship. Seasonal relationships provide camaraderie and fellowship in the many communities we reside. Those lifetime bonds – they’re pure gold.

The company I find along my path bring vibrancy and depth to my experience. When I listen to my intuition and use my imagination to invent tomorrow; the company that coincidence delivers to my door will surely delight and surprise me.

My path is unique. The people I meet along the way are an instrument of enlightenment, comparison is not required.

“Stop thinking you’re doing it all wrong. Your path doesn’t look like anybody else’s because it can’t, it shouldn’t, and it won’t.” – Eleanor Brownn

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T-Shirt Philosophy

Went on a t-shirt buying binge over the holidays.  Good distraction for what ailed me – plus I got to get my Philosophy geek on.  When my clan of enquiring minds said “huh?” – I realized I needed elevator cliff notes on what the T’s meant.  Of course one customer comment prophesized: “you realize no one will know what you’re talking about when you wear that.”

For future queries and my own recollection; my elevator notes:

  • Socrates – Corrupting the Youth, Since the 5th Century B.C.E.

The man who said:

“An unexamined life is not worth living.”

“True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing.”

“To find yourself, think for yourself.”

.. used questions as a method to expose people and issues; often making the distinguished look foolish.  By shining a light on the ignorance around him, Socrates pissed off his enemies. They convicted him of “corrupting the youth” and condemned him to death.  He wouldn’t run away even when he had the chance.  Now that’s standing up for what you believe in!

  • Plato’s Cave – Search & Rescue Team: Bringing you to the light, since 380 BCE

My first Philosophy class was organized around Plato’s Parable of the Cave in The Republic.  Made quite an impression.

When chained to a wall in a cave and nothing can be seen but shadows projected onto that wall – people will fabricate their reality.  Knowing no better, they watch objects pass by the fire behind them, and give these shadows identity.  Should a prisoner become free and escape the cave – eyes adjusting to the brightness, they see that the shadows weren’t real.

Most inmates though have no desire to leave their shadow world; the life they know.  So beware, you who would rescue them, they may turn on you and call you the crazy one.

  • J.P. Sartre – Condemned To Be Free, Since 1946

“Man is condemned to be free; because once thrown into the world, he is responsible for everything he does.”

Existential – Free will.  Are we free agents responsible for choosing our own development through acts of will?  Sartre says yes.

He says there is no choice but to choose; this is the human condition.  We say we must take the next right step.  What is the “next right step?”  It’s the step we choose to take.  Without justification; no excuses.  We choose the things we choose – because we choose them.  This is our great responsibility.  Quit blaming others or circumstances for how our life turns out.

It’s easy to forget where my sense of knowing comes from – those curious instincts and intuitions.  They come from years of discovery, learning and trying out my hypotheses.  From the stuff I read and my trial and error experience when I practice what I preach.  I remain forever grateful to my tribe of seekers – who relentlessly poke and prod me to remember.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

 “There is only one thing a philosopher can be relied upon to do, and that is to contradict other philosophers.” – William James

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What’s Next?

“The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” – Lao Tzu

It used to frustrate and annoy me that I was “just” a regular person.  Of course, my measuring stick was a bogus materialistic, societal façade.  Without money, looks, popularity or power – how could I impact the world?  Many of my past actions were calculated to attain distinction and prominence; but success was fickle.  Still without these accomplishments, what could I do?  Who was I?

Year by year, with deliberation – or sometimes serendipitously, my eyes opened and the false delusions shrank.  Lessons and teachers appeared that showed how one person makes ALL the difference.

Friend by friend I learned that conversations conducted with respect and consideration; acts of support and acceptance, whatever our differences – creates a community of genuine appreciation.

Step by step – doing the next right thing; my journey is full, rich and sharp with discovery.

Someone told me once that it didn’t matter where I was along the path – it was how far I’d travelled.  Comparing myself to others is a false conclusion.  Apples and orangutans.

Last Saturday at the Women’s March on Washington my objective was to be one of the bobbing heads showing up for inclusion, acceptance, love and solidarity.  The astonishing turnout, reactions of hope and communal validation, freaking bowled me over.  It took many regular people “just” like me to create that hive!

While it feels like it’s taken a damn long time to get to a point on the path where someone else started out – I see the significance of walking the distance.  Whether I’m an apple or an orangutan – I’m on the path.  One step at a time; I’ll do the next right thing – and little me will make a difference.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

“A wise woman wishes to be no one’s enemy; a wise woman refuses to be anyone’s victim.” – Maya Angelou

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Soul Reflections – My Friends

“.. a friend is incredibly precious.  A friend is a loved one who awakens your life in order to free the wild possibilities within you.” ― John O’Donohue

It takes time to cultivate friendships – time and the willingness to be known and vulnerable.

Still, beyond the practical and intentional – it also takes a spark of recognition; seeing the potential, what’s possible.  In his book Anam Cara, John O’Donohue quotes Boris Pasternak: “When a great moment knocks on the door of your life, it is often no louder than the beating of your heart, and it is very easy to miss it.”

And so it is with friendship.  The world is noisy and hectic – those soul moments with kindred spirits can easily be disbelieved or ignored.  But didn’t we agree to help each other long before we were born?

My friends fill me up; believe in me when I don’t believe in myself; remind me that I’m brave.

As a girl scout I was introduced to the importance of friendship – “Make new friends, but keep the old; one is silver and the other gold.”

Seasons come and go; and with some friends we share a short walk – others a marathon.  Some are our anam cara “soul friend.”  Each friendship reflects an intimate internal portrait.  We get what we give.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

“What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies.” ― Aristotle

“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.” ― Anaïs Nin

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