“Each of us has our own measure of pain. Sometimes the pain we suffer is great and obvious; sometimes it is subtle. . . . To survive we have to cover our heart, build up a layer of clay, and defend ourselves. We lose the belief that we are worthy of love.
“The mystic Simone Weil tells us,
“The danger is not that the soul should doubt whether there is any bread, but that, by a lie, it should persuade itself that it is not hungry.”
“Compassion reminds us that we do belong, as surely as we have been lost.
“The courageous heart is the one that is unafraid to open to the world.”
– Jack Kornfield, The Wise Heart
The Lie: “.. persuade itself that it is not hungry.”
Why do we do that? It isn’t easier to say I don’t want something when I do want it. The wanting doesn’t go away, it just goes underground. Then shows up in the most inconvenient ways … a sarcastic jibe; compulsive devouring of a second, third, fourth cookie; mindless web surfing, another hand of solitaire.
No, the danger isn’t in the rejection, the loss. The danger is when I deny I want what I want – that thing that rejected me; what I lost. Regardless of the circumstance . . . I am worthy; I’m worthy of attention, love, compassion – from others, from myself. I belong. Being courageous isn’t just facing fears and acting anyway (although that’s a good one!) – It’s admitting I’m vulnerable and showing it.
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“See it to be a lie, and you have already dealt it its mortal blow.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
