There was a burning bowl at Sally’s New Year’s Eve party:
“On a scrap of paper, write out what’s we
ighing you down; drop it into the flames: Let it go”
Symbolic gestures bring interesting revelations. This time it was some of the junk I carry around that doesn’t serve me. My scrap said “Let go of the Big Mad.”
In August I started doing “The Work” – a process developed by Byron Katie and outlined in her book “Loving What Is – Four Questions That Can Change Your Life.”
She recommends we do a “Judge Your Neighbor” worksheet – write down thoughts without restraint, about someone we haven’t 100% forgiven; be as harsh, childish and petty as possible. Apply Katie’s four questions to each statement and then “turn it around.” Started working through my treasure trove of resentments – fun stuff.
When I finished Byron Katie book 1, I went to book 2: “I Need Your Love – Is That True?” then book 3: “A Thousand Names For Joy; Living in Harmony with the Way Things Are.” Really saturated myself in the process.
The “turn it around” (what I call the mirror concept) was most illuminating; and painful. What I see in the world is a manifestation of what’s inside me.
This work, my resentments, the hateful, contentious election – and some deeply buried festering wounds all took their toll. I was mad; Big Mad. After the election – I was hysterical. Today I’m resolute.
Byron Katie is right, starting with even the smallest resentment and poking that bear brings out incredible insights. Awareness opens the door to growth; without it nothing can change. But Jeez – wow; gloom, despair and agony.
Going from mad to hysterical to resolute is no mean feat. Couldn’t have taken this particular trip 30 years ago when I was a novice seeker. I’m grateful for every lesson, each baby step – all teachers; good and bad.
2017 – I’m ready to “Let go of the Big Mad” – hell, even the “Little Annoyed.” They’re just stories I tell myself that keep me stuck. These stories aren’t real; not the truth. Time to tell better stories.
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
“Can you see a reason to drop this story? . . . And I’m not asking you to drop it.” ― Byron Katie
I can relate
Be sure to click on the “gloom, despair and agony” link – we’ve got to be able to laugh at ourselves too; or this soul searching would do us in.
Excellent, and timely as we begin a new year. Thanks!
Knowing I’m making up stupid stories in my head and that I can tell better stories – is my best foot forward into 2017.