Watching a show with my husband about a brilliant man, a sleuth; who is also an addict in recovery not going to his meetings. His best friend asks “what’s going on?” He replies “just the tediousness of maintaining my sobriety.”
His comment reminds me of Thoreau’s reflection that the mass of men live in “quiet desperation.” No doubt life can be tedious sometimes. Day after day – week after week – year after year: going to meetings, exercising, eating right, laundry, grocery, dishes; just getting up to make a living can take a toll.
Not feeling desperate – but tedious! I know boring, monotonous, tiresome and mind-numbing. Oh yeah, I know that routine. But I also know comfy, snug, secure and contented. Where’s the line? It’s got to be personal. When does my comfort zone become my prison? When is it time to push the boundaries of my secure little world? And how secure is it really? Do I need a wake-up? Or do I just need to push through “The Dip” Seth Godin writes about?
Dianne Collins (Do You QuantumThink?) invites us to wake up consciously and deliberately – if we don’t want it thrust upon us. Sherlock (the brilliant man) was thrown; his anonymity was broken. He was thrust out of his comfort zone – discombobulated! All the sudden he felt the repetitive weight of life. Some people get massive wake-ups with serious illness, or the loss of a job, a marriage, a home. Some wake-ups are itty-bitty, like the closing of my gym. However big or small; we are thrown – flung, hurled or chucked where we don’t want to be. Sometimes the quiet desperation follows.
In The Icarus Deception, Seth Godin says comfort zones originate as safety zones. But times change and safety zones move or expand – leaving our comfort zone behind. We become complacent, content with our little world. At least until our little world feels like a rut – or we get thrown. When does cozy become dreadful?
No, I may not be desperate, but man it was hard to get off my recliner and onto the treadmill Tuesday. I miss my work-out friends! I got up and did it, but that first step was a mountain, not a molehill. I keep telling myself I gotta keep on keepin’ on! Then out of the blue – one of those work-out friends asked me to join her team for a fitness challenge. Yay! Someone besides me to be accountable to! All of the sudden the mountain shrunk.
People – its people that motivate me to keep on keepin’ on! Sure I need personal drive and commitment. But without a REAL connection, a support network, it’s easy to get thrown – and not get back up. Whether it’s friends or family, a recovery group, a therapist – whatever! People that care, encourage and inspire – they help quiet the desperation; provide a hand to get up or the encouragement to push through the dip.
“People: People who need people; are the luckiest people; in the world!” – People; Songwriters: Bob Merrill, Jule Styne