Psychology – Behavior and Mind – Page 13

March 3, 2017December 30, 2022

Incremental Daily Progress – Drip, Drip, Drip

“… incremental daily progress (negative or positive) is what actually causes transformation. A figurative drip, drip, drip. Showing up, every single day, gaining in strength, organizing for the long haul, building connection, laying track—this subtle but difficult work is how culture changes.” – Seth Godin

Today’s blog post by Seth Godin reveals the key to making change. It’s not flashy, sexy and provocative … no, it’s ordinary, unadorned tenacity. The kind of resolve sustained by passion. A want so deep and strong it pulls me through the misery of tedium. Thru the monotonous research, analysis, writing, corroboration; re-writing. The dull study, practice, training and tweaking before more rehearsal. If it’s worth having it’s worth the trudge.

Four years ago I read the book, Younger Next Year by Chris Crowley & Henry S. Lodge, M.D. They told me that if I want to be vital and energetic; to maintain the get-up-and-go that gets more elusive each year – I need to stay active (“Exercise six days a week for the rest of your life”). Oh; and I need to eat right (“Quit eating crap!”). Two of my favorite things! HA! Gotta REALLY want health to make that effort.

The same goes for my education, my writing, my activism. In his book The Dip, Seth Godin says, “The Dip is the secret to your success. The people who set out to make it through the Dip—the people who invest the time and the energy and the effort to power through the dip—those are the ones who become the best in the world.”

“The Dip is the long slog between starting and mastery.”

“IMPORTANT NOTE: Successful people don’t just ride out the Dip. They don’t just buckle down and survive it. No, they lean into the Dip. They push harder, changing the rules as they go.”

Not everything is “dip worthy.” I must ask myself: am I settling for being “average”? Am I making a difference in this rat race? Am I living in a “cul-de-sac” AKA “dead end”? Is my job a cul-de-sac? What are the time wasters showing up in my life (Facebook, TV, solitaire)?

Seth encourages me to “find a Dip to conquer” – to quit the idling cul-de-sacs, quit the stuff I don’t care about; stop doing what I know I’ll only ever be mediocre at.

Life is the little things; and the “drip, drip, drip” of the Dip.

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“Water is fluid, soft & yielding but water will wear away rock, which is rigid and cannot yield … what is soft is strong.” ― Lao Tzu

March 6, 2016December 30, 2022

Time to Wonder Woman Up!

There are many obvious ways that people try and make us feel small. The more obvious the insult, the less likely I’ll believe it. It’s those sneaky, sideways slights and cheeky comments from people I know and like that trip me up.

My new mantra: “Don’t Take Things Personally,” lifts me above the crappy wave, but it’s still a crappy wave and easy to get sucked under.

In her book Presence; Bringing your BOLDEST SELF to your BIGGEST CHALLENGES, Amy Cuddy tells me to believe and own my story.

“Presence stems from believing in and trusting yourself – your real, honest feelings, values, and abilities.”

Yes! When I trust myself those snarky comments don’t take root.

She also suggests that we “can pose our way to presence … The way we carry ourselves from moment to moment blazes the trail our lives take.”

“Your body shapes your mind. Your mind shapes your behavior. And your behavior shapes your future. Let your body tell you that you’re powerful and deserving, and you become more present, enthusiastic, and authentically yourself.”

Do I choose “Powerful” – or “Powerless” poses? Which of these poses from her book strike a chord? Yikes – I see myself, ouch.

Power Poses

“The way you carry yourself is a source of personal power – the kind of power that is the key to presence. It’s the key that allows you to unlock yourself – your abilities, your creativity, your courage, and even your generosity. It doesn’t give you skills or talents you don’t have; it helps you share the ones you do have. It doesn’t make you smarter or better informed; it makes you more resilient and open. It doesn’t change who you are; it allows you to be who you are.”

Cuddy suggests we identify the best parts of ourselves – and believe them. Start by answering to a few questions posed by organizational behaviorists:

“What three words best describe you as an individual?
What is unique about you that leads to your happiest times and best performance?
Reflect on a specific time – at work or at home – when you were acting in a way that felt “natural” and “right.” How can you repeat that behavior today?
What are your signature strengths and how can you use them?”

IDENTIFY, KNOW AND BELIEVE!

“When we feel powerful, we make ourselves bigger”

Thank You! It’s time for me to get my Wonder Woman on!

Wonder Woman 1.2

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“As we let our own light shine, we .. give other people permission to do the same. As we’re liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” – Marianne Williamson

This talk was presented at an official TED conference:

November 28, 2015December 30, 2022

Okay Universe – Whatever it is; Bring It!

The quality of the affirmations I valued and kept 27 years ago surprised me. Yes, this is Now-me judging Then-me. Being seriously woo-woo back in the day, I was nervous to see what I wanted to manifest into my life. I’m rather delighted with Then-me. Two favorites:

“It’s okay to make noise. I express myself freely and joyously. I speak up for myself with ease. I express my creativity. I am willing to change.” – Louise Hay; You Can Heal Your Life

“I am harmonious, happy and divinely magnetic, and now draw to me my ships over a calm sea.” – Florence Scovel Shin; Your Word is Your Wand

The visual of drawing harmonious, happy “ships over a calm sea” is flat out appealing. Not limiting “my ships” to a material, relational or personal specific was brilliantly done Then-me! Considering some of the crazy going on at the time the desire for “a calm sea” wasn’t surprising.

Eight years ago my affirmations were full of “success” appeals – somehow I’d morphed into a full-fledged follower of the “prosperity gospel.” Our culture, the media, my workplace and some golden handcuffs had me chasing all sorts of worldly things that won’t necessarily bring lasting happiness.

Most recently my affirmations were about what generates joyful emotions within me.

Learning; the spark of joy when I “get it”
Being Physical Fit; strong, graceful and confident
Prayer & Meditation; feeling connection to “the All”
Connecting with my Power; knowing, without a doubt I create my world
Hiking with Friends; the peace of nature and loving camaraderie
Being with my husband & pets; chillin’ and playin’
Work that makes a difference and brings rewards

When I pair positive thoughts with this joy – I get giggly – or so darn grateful tears come to my eyes. THIS; this joy is worth manifesting in my life.

Instead of simply thinking myself a better reality; I can feel that reality into existence.

In his book You Are the Placebo, Dr. Joe Dispenza says that when we combine a thought, a clear intent and “embody the event emotionally” we change our brain; our “autonomic nervous system.” Dr. Joe says this “is vital because that’s the seat of the subconscious programming that’s been calling the shots.”

“It’s generally accepted in psychology that a person who experiences intense emotions tends to be more receptive to ideas.”

When these intense emotions are “Elevated” vs. “Limited” I’m building my brain to a better future. By focusing on gratitude I generate “the ultimate state of receivership.”

Let me embrace the attitude of gratitude and allow the Universe to bring it! What it looks like is immaterial.

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Mud Run

November 1, 2015December 30, 2022

Prove It

What I believe is stronger than any “positive thought” I might try to plant in my brain. No matter how many times I tell myself something, if I don’t believe it – it won’t materialize. In his book You Are the Placebo, Dr. Joe Dispenza says that we “can intellectualize” things, but if we “can’t emotionally embrace” them, they “can’t enter into the autonomic nervous system … which is vital because that’s the seat of the subconscious programming that’s been calling all the shots.”

It’s seems obvious that what I believe isn’t the same as what others believe. But I should know what I believe, right? Not! Grrr – I can’t be certain that what I believe is true – or real. Subconsciously I carry around many views that influence my perceptions and color my world in ways that, when consciously known, make me squirm.

How many times have I SAID I believed something – applied a positive thought; and nothing changed? Drat & Drat. I’ve got to go deep into my subconscious and tweak it – or maybe make a wholesale overhaul; whatever. Dr. Joe says the more suggestible I am the easier it is to reprogram my own brain. Then he goes on to tell me that it’s my analytical mind that could be getting in the way. Everyone has some level of analytical mind – some just lean harder one way or the other. There are highly suggestible folks; others, through schooling, how they were raised – or just their individual nature are harder nuts to crack.

Here we are, children of the “age of reason” – inheriting the riches from the Industrial Revolution; many of us joining the Prove It Generation. Dr. Joe says:

“.. if you’re continually analyzing your life, judging yourself, and obsessing about everything in your reality, then you’ll never enter the operating system where those old programs exist and reprogram them. Only when a person accepts, believes, and surrenders to a suggestion does the door between the conscious and subconscious minds open.”

Sound like anyone I know? Bwwaahahahaha!

Placebos work on people who believe. To change my beliefs; my thoughts, emotions and perceptions require personal conviction. This must be why I gobble books that integrate philosophy with quantum physics, biology of belief and molecules of emotion theory. These concepts are presented from a scientific point of view; following protocols that unlock the obstacles of my subconscious. The more I learn, the more sure I am that I can change who I am and my circumstances.

Pairing thoughts with an emotion is step one to move toward changing a belief.

“.. it’s generally accepted in psychology that a person who experiences intense emotions tends to be more receptive to ideas and is therefore more suggestible.”

Which emotion to perpetuate? I say we go with “Elevated” vs. “Limited” Emotions. As outlined by Dr. Joe they are:

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“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.” ― Carl Sagan