Yesterday, Wednesday, June 21, was the summer solstice. It came on the heels of a new moon. Alongside the astrological season of my rising sign, Cancer. All markers for new beginnings.
But at my house it’s raining. And I’m kinda glum. Those intentions I set back in December for the winter solstice hit multiple snags. Which interrupts my momentum. Maybe this constellation is a sign; a reminder that every day is a new beginning.
What I find particularly interesting is how life is a series of ups and downs. As I encounter obstacles, the universe sends comfort and relief.
Last week I felt “all the feels” Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hanh expresses here:
Today my horoscope tells me my “whole self is reinvigorated – down to every vibrating cell.” Bwahahahahahaha … for real?
Bwahahahahahaha
I’m not inclined to ride a rollercoaster through life. Definitely prefer balance and serenity – and laughter. However, when I acknowledge both the ups and downs it gives my psyche the symmetry it seeks. To deny either blocks my equilibrium.
Yes, every day is a new beginning. Every day I get to choose. And today I choose to nurture and be gentle with myself.
“I used to dream about escaping my ordinary life, but my life was never ordinary. I had simply failed to notice how extraordinary it was. Likewise, I never imagined that home might be something I would miss.”
― Ransom Riggs, Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children
We are who we believe we are. Choosing to be different is within our control. Seth Godin’s recent blog post points out this opportunity. He told a friend of his:
“The person we see when we look in the mirror is the person we become, the person we fight to defend and persist with.
If you see someone who doesn’t have a lot of friends, then every time a potential friend comes along, you will find a way to distance yourself from the heartache of being rejected, and you’ll continue to not have a lot of friends.
If you see someone who isn’t happy with inputs you can’t control, then when new inputs come along, you’ll find something wrong with them and seek more control not less.
If you see someone who thrives on challenges, challenges will become a chance to thrive.”
Seth encourages me to show up every day and see the person I want to be. This requires I acknowledge habits of thought that perpetuate a self I don’t want. With this insight, he suggests I change the stories I tell. Stop the drama and the dogged discontent I narrate – to myself and to others. Tell better stories.
Then behave accordingly.
“If you want to become the kind of person who can teach an 8-year-old how to play basketball, you can start doing that right now.
If you want to be the kind of person who leads, you can begin to lead.
If you want to.”
Acknowledge the problem.
Decide to change.
Reprogram beliefs.
Apply new behaviors.
Again and again and again . . .
“If you want to.”
“But this is human life: the war, the deeds, The disappointment, the anxiety, Imagination’s struggles, far and nigh, All human; bearing in themselves this good, That they are still the air, the subtle food, To make us feel existence, and to show How quiet death is.” – Keats
“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” ― Confucius
Everything’s gonna be okay. Platitude or attitude? When I’m overwhelmed or upset it feels like a cliché. But when I get quiet; when I slow down and put into perspective whatever’s carousing with my emotions – it becomes a relaxed confidence.
Byron Katie developed a method that starts by asking “Is it true?” Then … can you be absolutely certain it’s true? This is what she calls “The Work.” She goes on to ask us to consider how we react when we believe this thought – and who would we be if we didn’t?
I’m bombarded every day with stories created for clicks and eyeballs. Some are entertaining, far too many are disturbing. Back in the 80’s Don Henley called out the compulsive hunger society has for “Dirty Laundry.” It benefits me to question this tendency.
If there’s no way to be 100% certain the ugly crap is true, why believe it? Especially if it just makes me mad, sad and unfriendly. When I look for the positive and delightful in people and the world at large – I’m optimistic, happier and more pleasant to be around.
Neville Goddard tells me to use my imagination to create the world I want to live in. If I focus on negative things that I have no control over, the evidence of that attention appears in my life. Instead, when I turn my energy to solutions and empowerment within my circle of influence, the world changes for the better.
Happy Dog
So slow down. Look for the upbeat stories. Give the benefit of doubt to the growly, confused neighbor. Cultivate feeling groovy – like Simon and Garfunkel suggest:
It’s easy to say I’d do something different “knowing what I know now.” But I make choices with the information I have. This is my life to own; regret is futile. Choose to live.
Being paralyzed and doing nothing is worse than regret. Sylvia Plath writes in “The Bell Jar,” when I don’t choose, I starve and watch my options wither and die.
“I saw my life branching out before me like the green fig tree in the story. From the tip of every branch, like a fat purple fig, a wonderful future beckoned and winked.
“One fig was a husband and a happy home and children, and another fig was a famous poet and another fig was a brilliant professor, and another was Ee Gee, the amazing editor, and another fig was Europe and Africa and South America, and another fig was Constantin and Socrates and Attila and the pack of other lovers with queer names and offbeat professions, and another was an Olympic lady crew champion, and beyond and above these figs were many more figs I couldn’t quite make out.
“I saw myself sitting in the crotch of this fig tree, starving to death, just because I couldn’t make up my mind which of the figs I would choose. I wanted each and every one of them, but choosing one meant losing all the rest, and, as I sat there, unable to decide, the figs began to wrinkle and go black, and, one by one, they plopped to the ground at my feet.” – The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath
When I watch and pay attention the universe reveals connections. I especially enjoy seeing random, unrelated topics dovetail elegantly.
Recently I heard Neville Goddard truisms in the pop-rock song “Elemental” by Tears for Fears: “.. this race is already run ..”
Neville continues with: “Creativeness is only a deeper receptiveness, for the entire contents of all time and all space, while experienced in a time sequence, actually coexist in an infinite and eternal now.” He recommends:
“Live your life in a sublime spirit of confidence and determination; disregard appearances, conditions, in fact all evidence of your senses that deny the fulfillment of your desire.”
“Ignore the present state and assume the wish fulfilled. Claim it; it will respond.”
So, is the world finished – deterministic? What of Free Will – these desires and wishes? Or is creation done and Free Will still exist?
Physical reality, the mechanics of cause and effect and our linear experience of time don’t allow for Free Will. Perceptions of destiny are be found here; “if it’s meant to be, it will be.” Deterministic.
Yet I perceive my personal experience as real, genuine and intuitive; my choices independent. Free Will feels fundamental.
Holding these two contradictory positions as true is challenging: but worth pursuing. When I consider the principles introduced by quantum physics – the paradox becomes plausible. For the curious and analytical, check out this YouTube Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2UE7tp7oSw
Things don’t happen in a vacuum. We’re interconnected parts of a whole; a whole that feels tangible and certain. This can be helpful or harmful.
The damage is seen when too many people operate on autopilot. Habit, society and family conditioning create an unnecessary deterministic way to live. The cliché “same shit, different day” is thought normal and acceptable. Consistency is called reliability. Being capricious is fickle. Consider instead that consistency may be tedious and dry; and that whimsey and fancy enhance and enrich our spirit.
It seems people flip flop between the contractions depending on what suits them in the moment. The idea of destiny may alleviate my sense of responsibility for what’s in front of my face. A rote life is safe; until it’s not.
“Man is condemned to be free. Condemned because he did not create himself, yet is nevertheless at liberty, and from the moment he is thrown into this world he is responsible for everything he does.”
Thoreau observed that “the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation.” My responsibility is to step outside my comfort zone. Push past the fear and discomfort about what other people think or believe.
The desires of my consciousness exist – here in the infinite, eternal now. I AM that. This is my real world.
“Ignore the present state and assume the wish fulfilled. Claim it; it will respond.” – Neville Goddard
“For the first time, she did want more. She did not know what she wanted, knew that it was dangerous and that she should rest content with what she had, but she knew an emptiness deep inside her, which began to ache.” ― Iain Pears, The Dream of Scipio
