Living The Emerson Rule

March 16, 2023March 16, 2023

Embrace the Flaws – Feel the Love

Acknowledging the flaws that short circuit my serenity and growth is an act of self-love.

Defense Mechanisms

It’s hard to admit imperfections and shortcomings. Avoidance, denial and projection all conspire to block my progress and keep me stuck in the status quo. Finding support to fess up in today’s environment takes fortitude. Resolve, wherefore art thou?

Maybe I know what I know, but that stuff’s ghastly. So, look away.

Making the unconscious, conscious is unnerving. Denial keeps anxiety and distress at bay; nothing to see here.

If there IS something to see, it’s not me – it’s you.

In Psychology Today, Shahram Heshmat Ph.D. says these “defense mechanisms work by changing the way we feel or interpret a situation. But they do not change reality.” Ultimately, he says that the “price for this protection is the inability to develop resilience.”

Resilience

Life can be overwhelming when I deny, disparage, or push away parts of myself that I deem embarrassing or shameful. Kendra Cherry (What Is Resilience?) says “Instead of falling into despair or hiding from issues by using unhealthy coping strategies, resilient people face life’s difficulties head-on.”

Resilient people are survivors. Their feelings are in control, and they manage their emotions. They work through difficulties. Resilient people accept who they are and are kind to themselves. Recognizing “the importance of support” they know “when they need to ask for help.”

Resilience is a skill worth pursuing.

When I face life head-on, I own my rough edges and ugly moments. These cringy bits are common; everyone has them. They aren’t shocking, but understandable when I appreciate my story. Letting go of habits steeped in defense and sanctuary want a decision and discipline. Decisions aren’t possible without awareness. Change won’t come without self-acceptance.

Recently I found a letter I wrote as my Higher Self to my younger, judgy self. So gracious and loving. She reminded me that the choices I made carried me to where I am today. Each step gave me experience and wisdom. Today I’m laying groundwork for new insights and blessings. The journey continues; mistakes and disappointments are a given. When I love myself despite all that, miracles happen.

“Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you! Shout loud, ‘I am lucky to be what I am!’” – Dr. Seuss

March 9, 2023March 9, 2023

March is Here – Fasten Your Seatbelts

Astrologically speaking, March is a big month. Lots of movement; fasten your seatbelt. For those of us who follow the art of astrology it’s an eventful, spicy time. But nuanced and paradoxical.

In Astrology is an Art Liz Greene says that “simple answers are not what astrology is about.” Rather it offers a “set of mysteries to explore, and yet another set of unanswered questions to stretch our minds and transform our views of reality.”

My favorite astrologer is Chani Nicholas. She’s insightful and detailed. Her CHANI App, TikTok and Instagram accounts are fun and informative. Also, she prefaces her readings with an important reminder that they’re “to be read as inspiration.”

So, what’s happening?

MAMA BEAR: Saturn moved from Aquarius to Pisces on March 7.

Back in 2018 I was fascinated when Saturn entered Capricorn. Chani says that “Saturn has been in one of its home signs – Capricorn and Aquarius” since 2017. As the traditional ruler of both, their “boundaries and rules came unadulterated.” Pisces in Saturn may be more like a “jellyfish.” The Saturn structure “will feel gentler . . . its walls spongier and receptive to the changing tides.” Exciting stuff after the restrictions imposed by the pandemic.

PAPA BEAR: Pluto moves from Capricorn to Aquarius on March 23.

Pluto, the planet of transformation, last entered Aquarius in 1778 – 246 years ago. Astrologers are reminding us of the momentous events of that era. The French Revolution; Independence of the United States; the Age of Enlightenment; incredible inventions. Pluto will only be here for 2-1/2 months in 2023. Consider it a preview of what’s coming in 2024 and will last 20 years! Might history repeat itself?

BABY BEAR: Mars leaves Gemini for Cancer on March 25.

Mars, the planet of desire, drive and energy usually cycles a sign every two months. But it’s been in Gemini since Aug 2022–7 months. Gemini’s energy is restless in Mars but gives us the get-up-and-go to do something about it. With Cancer it’s a different vibe. Cancer is a “sign of emotional sensitivity and intuition,” according to Astrologer Rhiannon Liselle. Her advice is to connect “to your shadow, which makes itself known during oppositional transits such as these.” Whatever we encounter, our energy will be different.

Not enough? There’s more . . .

Three other fast-moving planets change signs this month. There are five conjunctions. A square. Well-aspected new and full moons. Two cazimis. A Sun sign change and the spring equinox. Phew!

Flowers are reemerging, trees are budding. Spring will be here in less than two weeks. I’m ready.

This is a great time to take an opportunity to feel the energetic shift; shake off the old and embrace the new. Change can be disquieting. But when I open my mind to potential and possibility, I can roll with what shows up.

“Dare to Know! Have the courage to use your own reason.”
– Immanuel Kant, What is the Enlightenment 1784

March 2, 2023March 2, 2023

Gratitude – This Life; It’s Marvelous

When I consider the experience of life – and the opportunity to steward the one and only me through it, I have choices.

These choices include many things. There’s gratitude, awareness and potential. They allow my heart to cultivate encouraging and helpful experiences.

The flip side is unconstructive. Thanklessness colors the world with gloom and despair. Not a fun place to hang out.

When Lady Gaga penned her hit “Poker Face,” she alluded to bold and daring themes. This gambling allusion strikes me as spacious enough to encompass the incarnation of life.

This is the life I was dealt . . .

Check this hand; it’s marvelous!

“Gratitude, like faith, is a muscle. The more you use it, the stronger it grows, and the more power you have to use it on your behalf.” – Alan Cohen

When I assume an “attitude of gratitude” .. even when my unconstructive flip side raises hell; my perspective will eventually change. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly as they say. But it will change.

February 23, 2023February 23, 2023

So Little Time – Spend It Wisely

Decades ago, mom gave me a T-shirt with the saying “So many books, so little time.” I still wear it, shabby and stained as it is. The sentiment reminds me of the abundance around me and to choose wisely – and of my mom. Our time allotment isn’t all that long. Spending it pursuing joy is important.

The Cycle of Life

Nature has its seasons, and life is cyclical. Last December during the winter solstice, I set an Intention for the coming year, including monthly check-ins at each new moon.

This week the second new moon of the year arrived – the Worm Moon. As I settled in for my promised monthly review, I was struck by how task oriented I am. Does this help me achieve my goal? Maybe.

My 2023 intention is to have “A Sense of Purpose.” This particular quest began knowing it’s an intangible and abstract proposition. Choosing where to put my time and energy is key. The three paths that called me were community, writing and self-care. They looked the most promising to deliver encounters with insight into the part I play in this life.

Being a singular person, self-care is vital. Prioritizing my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health gives me the stamina and inspiration to meet this mystery. My writing shows me what I know, what I don’t know – and the great chasm in between; not to mention as a door to be both brave and vulnerable. As part of a whole my community reflects where and who I am; offering direction and a foundation to grow.

I chose projects, experiences and encounters to pursue for each path. They are all delightful and motivating, and I eagerly jumped in.

In month one I acknowledged, HA! my eyes are bigger than my stomach and the banquet needed to be refined. My appetite is big, but I moved a few bits to a back burner. Still, I did look at potential time sucks; were they obstacles or assists? I’m talking to you TikTok! This question is still under review.

Month two included low energy and lack of motivation. Instead of shaking my finger at myself, I stepped off the treadmill and rested. So, not every box will be checked on my March “want to do” list, but a big win for Emotional Health (woot woot).

This is an interesting journey I set myself on, and I’m eager for more.

“Each man’s life represents a road toward himself, an attempt at such a road, the intimation of a path… But each of us – experiments of the depths – strives toward his own destiny. We can understand one another; but each of us is able to interpret himself to himself alone.”
― Herman Hesse

February 16, 2023February 16, 2023

Intellect vs Intuition – The Power of And

Intellect and intuition are two distinct animals. Understanding things rationally may ask me to set aside emotion, while my gut feelings lean into it. Both can be constructive on their own. When paired, they’re magical.

My studies emphasize logic and critical thinking. But, my inclinations favor the hunch. When life presents a possibility and its decision time, I’ll weigh my options. However, I ultimately trust what feels right. Ignoring the bad belly, the niggling doubt, or the emotional vampire bit my ass more than once.

When you know you know.

Cultural programming tells me common-sense is de rigueur. But is it? In an article from Psychology Today, Jim Taylor, PhD says: Common Sense Is Neither Common nor Sense.

“If common sense was common, then most people wouldn’t make the kinds of decisions they do every day. People wouldn’t buy stuff they can’t afford. They wouldn’t smoke cigarettes or eat junk food. They wouldn’t gamble.”

Dr. Taylor goes on to say that while Americans may revere this maxim, it’s but “a fallacy that has been foisted on us by our culture of ideology (any ideology that wants to tell us what we should think and do) that prefers us to be stupid, ill-informed, and poor decision-makers.”

Logic and questioning assumptions is not common-sense. Insight isn’t make-believe.

Yes, reason wants facts. Seeing is believing, and critical thinking promotes the need to analyze and evaluate an idea. Imagination calls for creativity and vision where believing is seeing. There’s a case for both.

Watching for omens and signs from the Universe is a favorite pastime. Trusting the message when it appears takes patience. That critical evaluation gives me confidence to follow my heart. In due course “the proof of the pudding is in the eating” as they say. Take the leap, enjoy life.

“Trust instinct to the end, even though you can give no reason.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson